Dr Renate Volpe in her "Self Esteem Nuggets" says: "We all need a private psychological space that belongs to us. This space is both physical and emotional. We need to set bounderies and limits in terms of what we allow other to do to us. We also need to set limits on what we will allow ourselves to do for other people."
My Goodness! How I wish I had known Renate when I started my business 4 years ago! I would certainly have not make nearly as many mistakes as I have made! I wouldn't have allowed clients to get away with not paying me for work that I had done, even though they had been given a discount because I felt "sorry" for them or allowed people who are hungry for my contacts to disrespect me and not pitch up for meetings, without so much as an apology. I certainly would not have allowed people to demand the use of my Intellectual Property without payment, like my knowledge and experiance that I have gained through blood, sweat and in some cases many buckets of tears, is not worth them paying for it, but they want it anyway.
Well, as in most things in life, when you give up your power, people will take it with both hands and be sure to understand they certainly won't even thank you for it!
So, be sure to set the bounderies, in your own minds:
1. You get what you pay for - Client's will pay you what you ask for. If you discount your hourly rate and give out freebies, that is the type of client that you will attract and believe me, the more discount you give them, the more that you try and help them the harder it will be to get your money out of them. I found that the more worthy I thought of myself, the more I charged, the better the calibre of client I attracted. Don't sell yourself short!
2. I have worked very hard for the people in my contact data base. They are professional people. Their services are sought after and they are well respected. If people want the contacts I have in my data base, I am more than willing to share, at no cost. However, if you do not pitch up for a meeting that has been confirmed, not only are you rude, but you have also disrespected me. You are telling me that my time and effort are of no importance to you. That your time and what you want to do with that time is more valuable than my time. Let me explain what it means to me - it means that you are not trustworthy. It means that I will not refer you and/or your services and/or the widgets that you so dearly want to sell, to anybody. It also means that I will not give you any of my contacts - you would probably disrespect them to!
3. If you want to know what I know, understand that I have paid dearly for it. I am of a more generous nature than you probably realize. However having said that, I am not a fool and I will not have you demand things from me or br manipulated into thinking that it is your God given right to have everything for nothing. If you go to a lawyer you are charged, very handsomely I might add, for the use of his/her knowledge. If you go to a doctor, the same thing applies. So if you come to me for the use of all that I know, there will come a point where I will begin to charge you. Don't get all upset and bent out of shape - understand that to give you that knowledge takes time and effort - my time and my effort. Be prepared to pay for Intellectual Property.
If you would like to know more about Dr Renate Volpe and who she is, please feel free to visit her site on www.HIRS.co.za.
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