Motivation - The Doer

MOTIVATION – The Doer

By Nikki Viljoen of N Viljoen Consulting CC

Vince Lombardi says “It is time for us to stand and cheer for the doer, the achiever and the one who recognizes the challenge and does something about it.”

I don’t know how you guys feel, but quite frankly I am sick to death of the whole debate (or even non-debate) around the state of the economy right now.  I was at a client last week and his phone rang.  Before he even asked the caller “how are you” he answered a question with “ja I know, this economy and the credit crunch is getting to all of us.”

I was gobsmacked!  We are getting like the Capetonians and their weather!  You cannot have a conversation without it coming up.  Yet look around you, every single road you turn down is having some sort of construction being done to it or a building going up in it.  Now what does that tell you?  Well it tells me that the economy here in South Africa is not as bad as it might be else where.  Every time you look at a newspaper there is another story of someone having stolen millions – now if there are ‘millions’ to steal, then there must be money somewhere.

Then of course there are the conspiracy theories, and I must admit I do enjoy these a whole lot more than the usual moaners and groaners.  At least these have a story that you can relate to or even find so far fetched as to render them completely funny!

Personally I am of the opinion that if we spent as much time getting things done as we spend moaning and groaning about whatever it is that we can find to moan and groan about – we would be gazillionaires!  All that hot air and energy that goes to waste all the time could be utilized for a far better purpose I am sure.

Then, not only do we moan and groan about the economy/weather/government/taxes (insert whatever else you would like to here), when we see someone else doing well, we moan about that too!

Instead of finding out why it is that they are being successful and trying to emulate their particular formula, we sit down and moan about how lucky they are and how unlucky we are and . . . .  there we go again.

Let’s change our mindsets shall we, let’s find at least one person everyday that we can say “Well done! You’ve done a great job!” to. Let’s find one person a day – I mean how difficult can that be – to congratulate on achieving something and really be pleased for them.  Let’s find one person who has had a thought about doing something differently and pat them on the back and give them encouragement to go forward.

And then, whilst we doing that – how about we give ourselves encouragement and congratulations and even a pat on the back for finding something right with our day and not always focusing on the bad.

Just one thing, one person, one day!  We can do it!

Nikki is an Internal Auditor and Business Administration Specialist who can be contacted on 083 702 8849 or nikki@viljoenconsulting.co.za or http://www.viljoenconsulting.co.za

Business Tips - Social Media - What Gives?

BUSINESS TIPS – Social Media – What Gives?

By Nikki Viljoen – Viljoen Consulting CC

Many of my clients seem  to be tearing their hair out because of staff taking time away from their designated jobs to ‘play’ on the social media sites or incessantly chat on their cell phones.

Twenty years ago Social Media was simply the radio or television and was relatively harmless to business – I mean it was quite easy to ensure that staff were not glued to the TV or the radio.  With the introduction of WWW (World Wide Web) and the internet however, things have changed drastically and currently employers are bearing the brunt of it.

Today we have all sorts of distractions such as (but not limited to) Facebook and Twitter and don’t forget BBM (Blackberry Messenger)!  According to an article written by Jan Du Toit entitled “Social Media: Guidelines on the policy for employees using social media for non-business purposes”, employees spend as much as 79% of their business day, playing on social networking and gaming sites. Never mind the work that doesn’t get done, there is also the cost of the resource that the company will ultimately be responsible for.  Just how long can any company, regardless of its’ size, continue doing business under these circumstances – my guess is not very long at all.

There have also been reported incidents where employees have been dismissed because of how they have disparaged bosses or colleagues or clients, publically – what kind of damage does that do to the reputation of the company as well as the individual?  Yes, technology has advanced us as a species into a wonderful world, where there is so much to explore and learn – sadly, it has also caused huge problems in terms of the way that it is being abused by individuals who have no control over their own actions and who are addicted to the games or the interaction.  Sadly many of us find that are lives are now governed by gadgets.

It is obvious, that in order for SME’s (small, medium enterprises) as well as big corporate companies, to survive the technical revolution, certain measures need to be implemented to ensure that staff spend their work time actually working and not playing in their personal capacities.  Enter the Social Media Policy.  This will set clear guidelines to ensure that staff do not abuse company resources and provide clear definitions between what is and isn’t allowed.

Here are some of the types of  issues that would need to be addressed:

If the employee is using media sites for business purposes, they must be aware of and clear on (but not limited to):

- Which social media sites can be used and when.
- The legality of postings and whether they are ethical or disrespectful and disparaging.
- The company’s confidentiality policy should not be breeched, this should include the personal details of management, colleagues and even clients and suppliers.
- Company details and information should be correctly disclosed, and only the official company logo should be used.
- In terms of compliance or legislation, it is also a good idea to ensure that all copyright laws are adhered to.
- Media type statements and public postings should always first be cleared by the employer or their designate.

For employees using the internet, social media (including cell phones and IM {instant messages applications}), they should be (but not limited to).

- Company policy on the use of company equipment as well as what social sites can be used and when
- Company confidentiality policy must not be breeched in any way, so company information must be kept safe
- The company code of conduct should be upheld
- Employees should only post in their personal capacities and not on ‘behalf of’ the company, their colleagues, clients or service providers and suppliers.
- Usage of cellphones should also be included here.

Furthermore, employees should be made aware of the consequences, should they fail to comply with the policy and a reminder that internet and e-mail and in the case of company cell phones, usage can and will be monitored.

It’s also a good idea to include this on the letter/contract of appointment, making sure that employees understand that when they sign their letters/contract, they also give employers permission to monitor the internet/e-mail/cell phone usage of the employer.

Please contact Nikki, if you require assistance with this policy or any other policies/procedures/templates that you may require.

Nikki is an Internal Auditor and Business Administration Specialist who can be contacted on 083 702 8849 or nikki@viljoenconsulting.co.za or http://www.viljoenconsulting.co.za

Motivation - The Mind

MOTIVATION - THE MIND

By Nikki Viljoen of Viljoen Consulting

Today’s quote comes from Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr. who says “Man's mind, once stretched by a new idea, never regains its original dimensions.”

Powerful words these, and certainly ones that I can relate to – actually they produced an “inside my head” type video and that I found quite delightful.

I don’t think I would like my mind to shrink back to it’s original dimensions as it would no doubt squash whatever epiphany I had just had, back out and it would then probably then be lost forever – what a sad thought!

Mostly though, once we have a new idea, it is generally followed by yet another new idea – how cool is that!  All you need to do is go with the flow and pretty soon you will be spouting new ideas like they are going out of fashion.

Sadly though, most people, once they have a new idea, take the decision to go no further.  So that is as far as they get and yet there is a world of opportunity out there for all of us to share.  All we need to do is open our eyes and our minds to the possibilities and they will appear before us.

So let me ask the question – what do you do when you’ve had a new idea?

Nikki is an Internal Auditor and Business Administration Specialist and she can be contacted on 083 702 8849 or nikki@viljoenconsulting.co.za

HR 101 - WHAT TO DO WHEN . . . . You Want To Dismiss Staff - Part 3

HR 101 - WHAT TO DO WHEN . . . . You Want To Dismiss Staff? Part 3

By Nikki Viljoen – N Viljoen Consulting CC.

As usual, our protagonists are standing by to make this journey just that little bit more understandable.  We have Mike the Business Owner and George the worker.

Let’s give ourselves a little bit of a story, so that we can understand the finer details.

This particular incident is going to be one of Misconduct.

Mike owns a string of retail stores, with most of them being in the bigger malls.  George is one of the workers in the warehouse.  George has been with the company for 5 years.  Mike has a warehouse in Johannesburg and the stock that is required by the stores is disbursed from the main warehouse in Johannesburg.

Mike has a reward program in place, whereby staff do not get bonuses as a 13th cheque, but rather a profit share as a percentage, based, not on turnover, but on net profit.  In this way the expenses and shrinkage are kept to a bare minimum, by the staff themselves, as they obviously want to share in the highest obtainable profits.

George was caught stealing by another warehouse worker, let’s call him Simon.  Simon, justifiably angry (remember George’s stealing has a direct negative effect on Simon’s bonus), states that he is going to report the incident to the Warehouse Manager, let’s call him Andrew.  George also gets angry and punches Simon in the face, breaking his nose and his jaw.

Mike has a proper set of procedures in place including a ‘Code of Conduct’ and since he has been in business many precedents have been set.  The Procedure Manual is readily and easily available to all staff members and in fact as and when procedures are updated and new ones introduced – the procedures are circulated to all the staff members who sign evidencing that they have not only read but also understand the procedures.

Most of the staff, certainly those that have been employed over a long period of time know and understand that that ‘theft’ is a dismissible offence as is ‘striking’ another employee.  The staff understands the limits and those same limits are documented in the ‘Code of Conduct’.

George is advised, in writing, that he is to make himself available for a disciplinary hearing and that the charges are ‘Gross Misconduct, in that he removed Company  Property from the premises without the required approvals and documentation and that he struck a fellow worker, breaking both his nose and his jawbone.”

This is not the first time that George has been in trouble at work and Andrew has had to both counsel and discipline George on several smaller infractions.  A full documented record is available in George’s Personnel File and it is clear that Andrew has tried, on countless occasions to get George to change both his attitude and his self destructive behavior.

You see George has a really aggressive nature and a terrible temper and there have been occasions where George has sworn at fellow workers and other incidents where George has either pushed or shoved other workers.

George has quite a history!

In view of the fact that most of the other incidents were of a minor nature, George was counseled regarding his behaviour and he has fully understood that his attitude needed to change in order for his behaviour to change, but George has not heeded any of the advice and despite being on a Final Written Warning, he has now committed a really serious offence that carries a ‘dismissal’ action.

George still has to be taken through the whole disciplinary procedure though, he cannot just be dismissed out of hand.  The disciplinary procedure itself must still be ‘fair’ and should be chaired by an ‘impartial’ person and evidence needs to be presented and the testimony of witnesses from both sides still needs to be heard, collaborated upon and carefully weighed before any kind of judgment is made.  In this case however, in all probability George may also face criminal charges of ‘aggravated assault”, as well.

George’s situation, at best is precarious.

Next week we will look at the Disciplinary Procedures relating to dismissal for misconduct.

Nikki is an Internal Auditor and Business Administration Specialist who can be contacted on 083 702 8849 or nikki@viljoenconsulting.co.za

Sales 101 - Timing is Key

SALES – Timing is Key

By Nikki Viljoen – Viljoen Consulting CC

I am sure that you have all experienced the sale that you really, really push for.  You are geared up and excited.  Everything seems to be going in the right direction and then  . . . . . . nothing.  You cannot seem to close the deal.  You cannot seem to get hold of anyone who can make a decision.  Everything spirals downwards and the whole bloody thing goes pear shaped.  You’re left sitting there wondering what the hell happened!

You go back to the beginning and analyze everything that you did, what was said, by whom and when and in all honesty you cannot for the life of you see what went wrong, where it went wrong, and why it went wrong.

Relax!  Chances are that it has nothing to do with you anyway but that it is a timing thing.  It happens to me all the time – it’s almost like I am ‘before my own time’ if that makes any sense.  Go back to them in a few months time, pitch it again and watch the whole concept fall on very fertile ground.  Most of the time it will seem as though you have pitched an entirely new concept, one that they have never even heard before.  It’s quite extraordinary.

Here’s the thing though – you need to stay in touch. Continue to build the relationship.  Continue to add value to the potential client.  Remain focused. Be consistent and be persistent and believe me it will pay you big dividends in the long run.

It’s just a matter of time.

Nikki is an Internal Auditor and Business Administration Specialist who can be contacted on 083 702 8849 or nikki@viljoenconsulting.co.za or http://www.viljoenconsulting.co.za

Networking 101 - Networking with Purpose

Networking 101 - Networking with Purpose

By Nikki Viljoen of N Viljoen Consulting CC

I was asked the other day, “what my purpose is” when I network. I must confess that I was a little confused by the question, until I realized that I was being asked the question by someone who is used to a completely different style of networking to the one that I tend to engage in.

You see for him networking was usually done as an entertaining social sort of thing, where people chatted genteelly around a table with a cup of tea in one hand and a sticky bun of sorts in the other. Where people smiled politely at one another and made small talk about the weather, the cricket/rugby/soccer, the latest fashion and who was doing what to whom on a regular basis.

This kind of ‘networking’ for me is quite simply, ‘a no go’. You see I am in the Business of Business to make a profit, making money is easy, but making a profit – well that is an entirely different thing altogether (but that is another story for another time). In order for me to make a profit, I need to grow my business – slowly but surely, one step at a time.

For me to grow my business, I need to look for opportunities, and believe me there are an abundance of them all around, it’s just a question of recognizing them and then doing something with them.

For me, the easiest way to search for opportunities, is at a networking event, where people are serious about doing business and who are hungry to find opportunities.

So for me, understanding my purpose for being at a specific type of networking meeting, is of the utmost importance.

Therefore the purpose for me attending a networking meeting is to meet people, and build relationships with them. It is to search for opportunities, whether they are for me as an individual, or a possible Joint Venture, or a Strategic Alliance, or even to see an opportunity for a business colleague and/or friend and/or client.

These opportunities and relationships, will allow me to grow my own business, and provide a ‘value add’ to both my clients and my colleagues.

For me, this is a win, win & win again situation.

So now, what was the question again . . . . . .

Nikki is an Internal Auditor and Business Administration Specialist who can be contacted on 083 702 8849 or nikki@viljoenconsulting.co.za

Business Tips - Be Careful What You Click On

BUSINESS TIPS – Be Careful What You Click On

By Nikki Viljoen – Viljoen Consulting CC

One of the things that I always try and engrave on the minds of all the delegates who go through my workshops is that it is important to have all your contracts in place.  Contracts between you and your partners and contracts between you and your suppliers, contracts between you and your clients and, for goodness sake contracts between you and your staff.  Contracts are really important.  But what does the word ‘contract’ conjure up for you?  For me it conjures up pages and pages of legalese, most of which I  cannot understand and probably need a whole week to go through, line by line, in order to understand exactly what the terms and conditions contained therein mean.

We’ve all been caught, I’m sure – by the unscrupulous retailers and service providers that have ‘something’ on the reverse of their invoices.  You know which ones I mean – where the writing is so small and squished together that you need a magnifying glass to read it.  They are the people, when you query something, who puff themselves up and sarcastically remind you that you accepted said terms and conditions when you accepted the invoice and then very importantly fax/e-mail you the front of the invoice/document that says something along the lines of “when you accept this invoice/document you agree to all the terms and conditions on the reverse of said document”.  Of course they never send you the reverse of the document and usually the end result (because it’s too much bother to fight the system) is that you just give up!

But what about electronic signatures?  What about when we ‘click’ on that button that says agree/disagree with the terms and conditions?  I mean really, do any of us even think about what that means?  Can anybody hold me legally liable because I clicked on a button?

Well here’s the thing – yes they can!  So if you click on the button to say that you are over 18 and yes you can go into that particular site – you know the one that your mother and father would be horrified if they knew you were going in there – you can be held accountable!  And no, it’s no good glaring at me – this is according to the ‘Electronic Communications and Transactions Act 2002’, which of course means that it is the law that says so!

In effect the Act says that information cannot be considered ‘without legal force’ just because all of it of even some of it is in the form of a data message.

You see, a ‘data message’ is something that is generated and/or sent and/or received and/or stored and/or archived electronically and if they can be accessed or used for reference, then they are recognized by law as legal.  Anything that can be printed or saved, fills the requirements and that of course includes Web-pages and e-mails and their attachments.  Electronic data, nowadays is in fact seen as the same as paper documents.  Therefore they are considered to be legal.

The Act also says “an electronic signature is not without legal force and effect merely on the grounds that it is in electronic form.”  This means that whilst a physical signature is used to make a contract binding an electronic signature that can be used to identify a specific person and that indicates their approval and/or acceptance of the electronic information, and it is therefore considered  a ‘signature’.

It actually goes even one step further because if you reach an agreement on say e-mail for example – that agreement will be considered legal and binding at the time and the place where the offer/agreement was accepted and our e-mails are pretty much ‘date and time stamped’.

Clearly that means that when you click on the required spot or you agree to ‘terms and conditions’ on a website, you are committing yourself to a legal and binding contract, which in terms of South African law, can be enforced.

Be careful where you click people!

Nikki is an Internal Auditor and Business Administration Specialist who can be contacted on 083 702 8849 or nikki@viljoenconsulting.co.za or http://www.viljoenconsulting.co.za

Motivation - The Opportunity to Begin Again

MOTIVATION –  The Opportunity To Begin Again

By Nikki Viljoen of N Viljoen Consulting CC

Henry Ford says “Failure is the opportunity to begin again, more intelligently.”

What an incredible opportunity to change our mindsets!  What an incredible opportunity to look at the world through different eyes.  What an incredible opportunity to make a choice, to stop beating ourselves up, to pick ourselves up, dust ourselves off, learn the lesson and move on with renewed energy, a lot of insight and a smile of optimism on our faces.  I surely do like it!

Most of us look at failure in a really negative light.  In this country, we are so programmed to be successful that failure of any kind has a really bad stigma attached to it.  People look at someone who has failed as though they have some sort of contagious disease and who should be avoided at all costs.

Yet the fact of the matter is that we all fail on a daily basis.  The reality is that are not born perfect and that we have to learn.  The challenge here though, is that we need to learn from our mistakes and not repeat the same mistake over and over again.

Then of course is the myth that many people have, that ‘opportunities’ never come their way!  What a load of hooey! Yes of course opportunities can come your way (or not) but the other reality is that you can make your own opportunity.  Our thoughts can become our realities if we put in the right ingredients and that of course is the ‘action’.  Even those opportunities that fall out of the sky like manna from heaven, still need to be actioned.  Without action they remain . . .  well opportunities.

I am often amazed at the reaction of individuals who sit around and bemoan their fate, nothing works for them, everybody hates them, none of their ideas or their schemes take off, Networking doesn’t work for them and they wait for something to happen, something to rescue them and nothing does!  Well, quite frankly – what on earth did they expect?  The miracle that is, is life (and even that required an action), for everything else we have to get up off our rear ends and do something about it!

Simple, isn’t it?  So when you fail and fall down – stop crying and moaning and waiting for an angel to come and rescue you.  Think about what you have done that got you there in the first place, make adjustments to what caused the problem, pick yourself up, dust yourself off and get going – find the opportunity and then do something (albeit different) about it.

Nikki is an Internal Auditor and Business Administration Specialist who can be contacted on 083 702 8849 or nikki@viljoenconsulting.co.za or http://www.viljoenconsulting.co.za

HR 101 - What to do when . . . You Want to Dismiss Staff - Part 2

HR 101 - WHAT TO DO WHEN . . . . You Want To Dismiss Staff - Part 2

By Nikki Viljoen – N Viljoen Consulting CC.

Please note that this pertains to South African Labour Relations and Best Practice requirements.

So here we are again – let’s look at what is considered an ‘unfair’ dismissal.

• any dismissal that is not done for a fair reason (like you just don’t like the person) is considered ‘unfair’.
• any dismissal that takes place without the proper and fair procedure, irrespective of whether  it is in accordance with any notice period in a contract of employment or in legislation governing employment.  So this means that you cannot just come to work one day and decide that George has to go, because he is irritating the hell out of you, so you give him a month’s notice as per his Letter of Appointment and in compliance with legislation – I mean you did give him a month’s notice so what is the problem?  Right?  Wrong!

Each time you dismiss someone, please understand in order for you to ascertain whether it is fair or not is always determined by the facts of the case and whether dismissal is appropriate or not as a penalty.

I would also like to add in here that it is also determined by precedents that have been set in previous cases.  Let me explain.  If two years ago one of your employees (let’s call him Philip) was caught stealing say R100.00 out of the till and Philip managed to convince everyone at his disciplinary, that he had ‘borrowed’ the money for taxi fare and that he intended to pay it back the following day and you gave him a ‘Final Written Warning’ in consequence of his actions and now George is caught stealing say R100.00 out of the till and George now also says that he ‘borrowed’ the money for taxi fare and that he intended to pay the money back the next day, but you are fed up with George because his attitude is bad, so you dismiss him – this would be construed as ‘unfair’ dismissal because you did not dismiss Philip for the same offense, two years ago.  So be careful when dishing out punishments for first time offences – they may just come back and bite you on the rear end in the future!

You still have to follow the correct procedure and whether the procedure is fair or not is determined by, but not limited to, the following guidelines.

There are three grounds, by which ‘dismissal’ is considered fair and legitimate, by the Act.

These are:
• the conduct of the employee (which is why it is of critical importance to have a documented ‘Code of Conduct’ for your Company)
• the capacity of the employee and
• the operational requirements of the employer’s business.

The Act says that a dismissal is automatically unfair if the reason for the dismissal is:
• anything that is an infringement of the basic rights of employees and/or trade unions or
• if the reason is one of those that is listed in section 187.

These reasons include, but are not limited to:
• if the employee participates in a lawful strike
• if the employee intends to become or is pregnant
• any acts of discrimination against the employee.

Where the dismissal is not automatically unfair, the employer has to show that the reason for the dismissal is because the employee’s conduct was in question or that the employee’s capacity was in question or it is based on the employee’s failure to meet the operational requirements of the employer’s business.

If you, as the employer cannot show this or if you cannot prove that the dismissal was performed within the parameters of fair procedure, then the dismissal will be deemed as unfair.

In essence you have to make very sure that you have all your ducks in a row and that you can substantiate and prove anything that needs to be proved in this respect.

Next week we will look at the Disciplinary Procedures prior to dismissal.

Nikki is an Internal Auditor and Business Administration Specialist who can be contacted on 083 702 8849 or nikki@viljoenconsulting.co.za

Sales 101 - Time Wasters & Ideal Clients

SALES 101 - Time Wasters and Ideal Clients

By Nikki Viljoen – Viljoen Consulting CC  September 2009.

Boy oh boy, did I learn the hard way about time wasters!  Look we all get enthusiastic about meeting someone who clearly understands what it is that we are trying to sell them (be it widget or service), and I am sure that we also understand about the building of relationships and how that can also take time, that said I am sure we have also come across time wasters.  You know them, they are the people who love to have meetings, they love to set up meetings and you have to juggle all of your appointments to fit them in and then at the last minute, when you are on your way to meeting them (if you’re very lucky), they contact you and cancel.  Or if they actually make the meeting, it’s more of a social discussion than anything to do with work and then suddenly they have to dash off somewhere and they schedule another meeting with you and it has to be on a specific date and time that is good for them and you have to move all your appointments to accommodate them and then the same thing happens and so it continues and months down the line you find that they are not authorized to make the decision or as much as they want or need ordesire to have what it is that they are selling, they just don’t have the money right now because they have a cash flow problem that they don’t think will sort itself out in the foreseeable future – yes time wasters, I sure have had a few of them!

So how do you tell the difference between the typical time waster and an ideal client?

From what I understand this is the eighty five million dollar question.

On the other side of the spectrum, an ideal client is one that understands exactly what you are wanting to sell (be it widget or service), they understand how whatever it is that you are wanting to sell will benefit them, they have the means to pay for said service or widget and they want it now! They are professional people who are also busy and don’t want their time wasted and have no desire to waste yours either.

Quite frankly, it is extremely difficult to tell the one apart from the other and let’s be honest, how do you know if you are wasting your time or letting the opportunity of a life time slip through your fingers?

Perhaps we should be looking at it in a different way.  If you had a huge number of leads, which ones would you go after and which ones would you let go?  How do you tell of the lead is a good one or not.

I know that I for one, more often than not leaves it more up to chance.  If I get a card, then that for me is a lead, if I can’t get hold of the person (after several tries), well I put it aside for another time.  When someone physically gives me a lead, I will try and call – if I cannot get hold of them (after several tries), I advise the person who gave me the lead and I put it aside for another time.

Is that the right way to handle it – I have absolutely no idea.  What I do know though, is that while I am wasting time trying to get hold of and leaving countless messages for, people who don’t come back to me (even though I know that they need my assistance), there are others who also need my assistance who do come back to me and those are the people that I will work with in the first instance.  If I have time afterwards and I can get hold of the others at some point, then yes  - I will assist them, of course I will, but it will be done in my time.

If I find myself going backwards and forwards to the same clients who continually have nothing to say, the I make polite goodbyes and ask them to call me when they need me – I do follow up with them from time to time, but for the most part – I move on.

My time is very precious and quite frankly, I can waste it all by myself, I don’t need help from anyone else.

Nikki is an Internal Auditor and Business Administration Specialist who can be contacted on 083 702 8849 or nikki@viljoenconsulting.co.za or http://www.viljoenconsulting.co.za

Networking 101 - Being a Connector

Networking 101 – Being a Connector

By Nikki Viljoen of N Viljoen Consulting CC

For the most part, networking for different people means different things.  For some it is about building relationships with a view to doing business in the future. For others it about selling their product or services – quickly.  Some on the other hand, use networking to be able to ‘buy’ whatever product or services that they need in order for their businesses to run smoothly and for a very select few it is about being a “Connector”.

Part of me being a ‘natural networker’ is that I am a ‘Connector’.  Connectors are people who do not only attend networking meetings to build relationships, to sell their products, to buy another product or even to have a few drinks or a coffee with someone, they like to match people up.  They like to introduce people to one another.

Thursday is my networking meeting day.  It is the day that I sit, from around 9.00am to around 4pm at ‘my office’ at the VovoTelo in Cresta (where I get excellent service I may add from the guys there, thanks guys) and I meet with people all day long.  These are the people that I have met briefly at a networking event, be it at the Inner Circle, or Business Engage, a Business Masters gathering, Rachel’s Conversations that Matter or indeed, even someone that I have met on Facebook.  I allocate an hour for each person – some take longer, some don’t need the whole hour and strangely enough, some don’t even pitch at all!

I listen to their stories, and am often amused by the fact that many arrive at the meeting and they have no clue as to why they are there!  All they know is that I have phoned them up, booked an appointment to see them (sometimes as much as 3 months in advance), confirmed the appointment the day before it has to take place, and now they are here!  To them I say – Well Done!

I digress - so I listen to their stories, try and understand what it is that they do in their business, who they need to ‘connect’ with and why.  As they talk I make notes and ask questions in order to understand something in a few minutes, that they have sometimes built up over months and years.  As I make notes and ask the questions about ‘target markets’ and the like, my mind wonders through my data base and the kind of people that they should be connecting with.  I start off by industry and then work on the individual in that industry.

For example, if I am talking to someone in the printing industry (yes I know we all need business cards, but there is just so much more to printing), my natural reaction would be to put them in touch with all the Training people (training manuals, course material – presentations and the like), all the Event Marketing people (banners, corporate gifts and the like), Team Building people (course material, manuals, banners), Advertising and Marketing people (corporate gifts, brochures etc) and of course the Corporate Gift people ( pens, t-shirts and the rest of the paraphernalia, that goes with that).  Sure, if I hear of someone who needs to have their Business Cards printed I will send them along to you too!

Whilst ‘listening’ to your story and asking the questions that I ask, I may also understand that you may have a problem somewhere in your business.  You may be experiencing difficulty with your financials and may be looking to outsource you Bookkeeping functions or you may be needing someone to help you with your frustrating IT problems, or you maybe battling to get the right staff – whatever that problem is, I have no doubt, that somewhere in my database there will be someone who I can refer to you to be of assistance to you.  Even if they are not in my direct data base, I can go to Business Masters, Inner Circle, Business Engage, Every Woman and ask for assistance.  Somewhere, someone knows somebody who knows somebody else, who knows or who can refer me to someone who knows who you need to help you with whatever problem it is that you have.

Hence the saying “There are no problems, just opportunities!”  Your problem is someone else’s opportunity!

When I am connecting people (and believe me when I say it isn’t just at my Thursday meeting that this happens), I am in my element – this is the world that I love.  Why you may ask, well it’s because I can add value to the people in my data base (or network) by moving them from one contact to another.  In this way the networks of all the different contacts ‘cross pollinate’ so to speak and in so doing I add value to myself and also grow my Network.

You see my networking isn’t just a matter of you ‘helping me right now’ or of you ‘selling me something right now’, it’s about finding synergies, from the people that I have known for years and the new people that I am meeting right now.  It’s about bringing the ‘old’ and the ‘new’ together so that they can do business together.

It’s about building credible relationships, not only between myself and the new people that I meet, but also between the new people that I meet and the people that I have known for years.

So what does networking mean to you?

Nikki is an Internal Auditor and Business Administration specialist who can be contacted on nikki@viljoenconsulting.co.za.

Business Tips - Preoccupations

BUSINESS TIPS – Preoccupations

By Nikki Viljoen – Viljoen Consulting CC

Dr Renate Volpe, in her Leadership Insight Nuggets says “The “new age” leader appreciates that preoccupation with living issues, affects our ability to perform at optimal potential”.

My obvious question (well to me it’s obvious) is – how could it not affect our ability to perform at optimal potential?

In my youth, I can clearly remember often being told (or hearing it being told to others), ‘don’t bring your problems to work!’  Whilst I do understand that we are employed or alternatively, we employ people to perform a specific task or function, the reality is that we are human beings.  As human beings we have feelings and emotions and we are not programmed like a ‘light switch’ to be turned on and off.  Quite frankly that’s like ripping the wings off an aircraft and expecting it to fly!

That said, there are often those employees that always seem to have something wrong.  If it’s not one thing then it’s another. They seem to live their lives in some form of disaster area, and the constant emotion that this generates as they go from person to person looking for sympathy and attention can be very trying as well as exhausting.

So where and how do you draw the line?  Realistically, as an employer you do need to have your productivity and the quality of your product or service, maintained.  You do have to ensure that the work gets done, because if you don’t, you will lose clients and losing clients will put your business, your staff and you at risk.  It really is a fine line and different things work for different people.

Although I don’t really do the ‘emotional’ thing very often, when it comes to staff – I am aware that different people handle different things in different ways.  Some people withdraw, some people act out – the bottom line is that as the employer, you have to know and understand your employee and then you have to deal with each employee based on who they are and how they react to any given situation.

Obviously that does not mean that you have to allow yourself to be abused by your employee and no, showing your ‘soft side’ does not make you a softie, but you do need to be able to show empathy and support.

How you do that of course, is up to you.

If you would like to know more about Renate, please visit her website on http://www.drrenatevolpe.co.za

Nikki is an Internal Auditor and Business Administration Specialist who can be contacted on 083 702 8849 or nikki@viljoenconsulting.co.za or http://www.viljoenconsulting.co.za

Motivation - Stuff Happens, Deal With It

MOTIVATION –  Stuff Happens – Deal With It.

By Nikki Viljoen of N Viljoen Consulting CC

Today’s quote comes from Aldous Huxley who says “Experience is not what happens to a man, it what a man does with what happens to him.”

Profound words I am sure you will agree and certainly ones that made me dig deep . . . really deep.

You see, of late, I have been really struggling with ‘my life’s purpose’.  For a while now, everything has been a mission – getting new clients, getting paid, getting people to my workshops, even getting the work done (its that time of the year when I battle with sinus and coughs and sore chest and this year I added ear ach to the mix as well).

To make current matters worse (although in many ways it is also very exciting too), I have also been working on four different long term projects, that will certainly pay handsome dividends  . . . .  down the line, but at this point bring nothing in and cost a fortune in terms of time and energy.

Technology challenges with my website being hacked into, servers going down and a general disruption of my life has left me feeling more than a little cut off and a tad isolated.

“So what’s this all about?” I started to wonder “Why am I here and is it worth all of this effort?”  Isn’t it strange how at the first hint of things not going the way that we want them to, that this is generally the first thing that we think?  Well I do!

This for me is where today’s quote and what it means, is so important.  Sure there are a number of options open to me.  Some are as simple as closing up shop and getting myself a job (not really an option I must say, as it would kill my spirit and make me even more grumpy than I usually am), some as scary and as deep as  . . .  ok, I’m not going there and a whole host more in-between.   Being a logical person though, I did have to look at ALL of my options, unemotionally and fairly and then made a decision.

I had to make a decision on the ‘what and how’ I felt and the ‘where’ of my life, based on what I felt as opposed to being guided through the whole process by my mentor, it was time to stand on my own two feet.  It was damn scary I can tell you!

Let’s just say that I had to think about things that I didn’t want to think about and go to places inside myself that I haven’t been to for a long time and that I would prefer not to have to visit again.  We all have a ‘dark side, so I know that you know what I am talking about.

So I hear you asking – ‘what will you do?’

Well I am feeling a lot better and I am sure that has a lot to do with as I find being sick very exhausting.  A whole bunch of ‘new’ opportunities have presented themselves and the ‘old’ opportunities  seem to have taken on a new life of their own.  I have completed as much as I can on some of the long term projects and now await the outcome, which I know is out of my hands and in the hands of the “Gods” (whomever you perceive them to be).

I look around me and have a deep sense of something about to happen, like the electricity in the air just before one of our infamous Highveld storms.

I know that whatever is going to happen, will happen whether I worry about it or not and it will happen when it should and not a moment before.

I know that I have a purpose and that I am going in the right direction, but that there are times when I am too impatient for my own good and I try and push to make things happen faster, when in fact I should be resting, so as to be ready, willing and able, when they do happen.

I know that often I am the biggest ‘doubting Thomas’ in my own life, when I doubt my ability and my capability and then I am always gobsmacked when people tell me of the impact that I have had in their lives, and then I do a 180 degree turn around and become humbled by who I am and what I have achieved and how much more there is for me to achieve.

And then I see words like “experience is not what happens to a man, it is what man does with what happens to him”, and I know that I am fine and I know that ‘ all is well’ with my world.

Nikki is an Internal Auditor and Business Administration Specialist who can be contacted on 083 702 8849 or nikki@viljoenconsulting.co.za or http://www.viljoenconsulting.co.za

HR 101 - What to do when . . . You Want to Dismiss Staff - Part 1

HR 101 - WHAT TO DO WHEN . . . You Want To Dismiss Staff? Part 1

By Nikki Viljoen – N Viljoen Consulting CC.

Please note that this pertains to South African Labour Relations and Best Practice requirements .

More and more I am getting questions around “when can we dismiss a staff member” or indeed “when should I dismiss a staff member”.

There are a host of reasons for dismissing staff, the question though is whether it will seen as ‘fair’ or ‘unfair’ dismissal.  When faced with a dismissal that is either ‘unfair’ or even borderline ‘unfair’, you can be sure that you might just end up at the CCMA and that brings on a whole different world.

So here are some pointers of what can and cannot be done – please be advised that these are ‘some’ pointers – certainly, not everything will be covered and always ask advice from a Labour Attorney should you be confused.

There is a ‘Code of Good Practice’ available on the Department of Labour’s website and whilst this deals with some of the key issues around dismissals, specifically those related to an employee’s conduct or their capacity to do a particular function, it remains general.  In other words each case is usually quite unique and there are some instances where the issues or “what took place” are completely outside of what is considered ‘the norm’ in the “Code of Good Practice’.  This may include but not be limited to circumstances such as the number of employees and so on and therefore a different approach would be needed to resolve these issues.

For the record the “Code of Good Practice’ was established as a guideline and it was not intended to be substituted for disciplinary or grievance procedures.  These procedures still need to be followed correctly.

For the ‘Code of Good Practice’ to be effective, both employees and employers should treat one another with respect.  The spirit of the Code is for both parties to have a ‘win/win’ experience.  The employer must be able to operate their business effectively and the employee must be able to work in a safe and efficient environment.

The whole purpose of the ‘Code’ is for employees to be protected against frivolous actions on the part of the employer, however that said the employer is also entitled to a satisfactory work performance as well as acceptable conduct from their employees.

Next week we will look at some of the ‘fair’ and ‘unfair’ reasons for dismissal.

Nikki is an Internal Auditor and Business Administration Specialist who can be contacted on 083 702 8849 or nikki@viljoenconsulting.co.za or http://www.viljoenconsulting.co.za

Sales 101 - Listen to the Customer

SALES 101 – Listen To The Customer

By Nikki Viljoen – Viljoen Consulting CC

So many times I take a call only to find that it is someone trying to sell me something.  I hate these calls – not necessarily because I don’t want to buy whatever it is that they are selling (although that usually is the case), but also because the calls usually come when I am busy with something else, or I have a deadline or (and here is the most annoying thing) the caller is not interested in listening to anything that I have to say, but is only interested in making the sale – at whatever the cost!

Sadly with me, it usually is at the cost of the sale and in some cases (depending on how annoyed they make me) at the cost of the customer (and yes they are two different things).  Yet they never seem to learn.

I have had callers demanding to know why I will not invest in a funeral policy to people challenging me when I tell them that I don’t have time to listen right now, to promises of “I’ll phone you back tomorrow because I can make a difference in your life!”  How presumptuous.

Yet still they don’t listen and the more they don’t listen or learn the lesson, the less opportunity they will have to get their itchy little fingers on the contents of my wallet.

You see, it really doesn’t matter to me if I buy from them or not, because . . . . well because there are hundreds and hundreds of little (or big) businesses, selling the same product or service, who would also like to get their itchy little fingers on the contents of my wallet.

So learn the lesson – if you want my business, you have to be the person who irritates me the least, who intrudes upon my time the least and who listens the most.

Listen to your customers – listen to what it is that they need the most from you and then give them exactly what it is that they want – the sale will always then be yours.

Nikki is an Internal Auditor and Business Administration Specialist who can be contacted on 083 702 8849 or nikki@viljoenconsulting.co.za or http://www.viljoenconsulting.co.za

Business Tips - Politics in the Workplace

BUSINESS TIPS – Politics In The Workplace

By Nikki Viljoen – Viljoen Consulting CC

Dr Renate Volpe, in her Nuggets on Political Intelligence says “Good politics advance the organizations agenda as a whole.  They are appropriate and future oriented.  Negative politics maintain the status quo, promote group think and advance the individual’s agenda, usually at the expense of others.”

Being an Internal Auditor in many ways was my saving grace.  You see I had to remain objective, I had to put myself apart and in doing so I was fortunate enough not to get involved in the internal office politics.  What I  did do however was watch the political plays that were taking place and the various agendas that were played out, both transparent and hidden,

Very like the politics in any country, the politics in a company can actually make or break careers and if not controlled and managed properly, could ultimately result in the downfall of the company, particularly if there is a huge amount of in-house fighting and egos that are out of control.

In-house fighting and bad office politics usually has the employees taking sides as they battle for their place in the hierarchy and hold on tightly to the coat tails of the person that they have backed, and this usually results in a split in loyalties.  Focus of the business and its requirements, is lost and quite frankly when your eye is ‘off the ball’, chaos reigns.

Politics that is good for business and positive and for the betterment of the employees as well as management and the clients, usually will result in better and greater achievements.

The bottom line – happy employees and happy customers make good business sense.

For further information regarding Renate please go to her web address at http://www.drrenatevolpe.co.za .

Nikki is an Internal Auditor and Business Administration Specialist who can be contacted on 083 702 8849 or nikki@viljoenconsulting.co.za or http://www.viljoenconsulting.co.za

Motivation - Taking Responsibility

MOTIVATION –  Taking Responsibility

By Nikki Viljoen of N Viljoen Consulting CC

Gita Bellin says “People fail many times, but they become failures only when they begin to blame someone else.  Experience is determined by yourself – not the circumstances of your life.”

Boy oh boy, does this resonate with me at the moment!  Over the last few years, December and January seem to be the time when I do the most disciplinaries.  For whatever reason, Companies want them done either to start the year with a clean page or to start the year sending the right message.

For the first time ever though, I’ve had to postpone a disciplinary in the middle of cross exam of a witness and the case is postponed until May next year – the reason – well the defendant is pregnant and going on maternity leave – it’s a strange situation to say the least.

What has really come out of the last few disciplinaries though, is really what I want to talk about and that is the defendants absolute inability to accept the fact that what they have done is wrong.  It’s like people refuse to accept responsibility for their own actions or inactions for that matter.  I’ve heard the strangest of excuses – like ‘the work was not completed correctly because I am having marital problems’ or ‘I made a mistake, but it was a long day and. . .’.

I’ve heard how an employee argued with the boss on ‘how’ he wanted something done, I suppose because she thought she knew better, only to end up not performing the task at all, because she ‘forgot’.  The fact that she ‘forgot’ ended up costing the company an additional R6 000-00, but she is still indignant because he dared to question her.

I’ve heard how an employee refused to use a ‘check list’ to perform her tasks and as a result of that an invoice was raised incorrectly and because the invoice was raised incorrectly, customs impounded the goods and apart from the cost of the goods, just the cost of the courier fees (R40 000) has now had to be written off.  The employee is screaming ‘victimization’ because the boss dared to call her into a meeting and chastise her.

Or what about the employee, who confirmed with her boss that the stock was in the hands of an event organizer, only for him to discover (when he arrived in the foreign country) that it had not been sent – but hey, she lodged a grievance against him because he complained!

What on earth has happened to the world?  What has happened to self-respect?  What has happened to taking pride in what it is that you do?  I don’t know hey – I think this new “X” or “Y” generation (whichever one it is) has no fundamental foundation and no backbone.  A few weeks ago, I was moaning about  the school kids today who get everything handed to them – well I think that this inability to take responsibility for one’s actions is a direct result of this.  Well you never did the work, so how can you take the responsibility? Right!

I think in ‘sparing the rod’ we have not only ‘spoilt the child’ but we have created a generation of monsters.  On the one hand they have the longest umbilical cords, because of their inability to do anything for themselves and on the other hand, because they don’t know how to do things for themselves – well how can anyone (including themselves) hold them responsible for their actions.

This, for me is a really sad state of affairs – how will they grow as individuals?  How will they become productive, worthwhile members of the human race?  How will they cope, when all the ‘baby-boomers’ have all passed on to greener pastures and there is no-one left to do the work for them?

Can you imagine a world, where everybody did their own thing, because – well they know better, and then when the smelly brown stuff hits the fan and splatters, everyone blames everyone else.  How will anything get fixed?  When will the work get done (never mind how it gets done)?  How will success be measured – will it be by the number of people you blame for your inability to perform a function?

Its mind boggling and I cannot see ‘how’ to fix it.  Actually, if the truth be told – I am not sure that it can be fixed.

What it does do though, is make me understand how important it is for me to continue doing what it is that I am doing because if just one person sees the light and understands the lesson, then I have succeeded in what I set out to do.

So I guess, “one person at a time” will continue to be my goal.  One person at a time!

Nikki is an Internal Auditor and Business Administration Specialist who can be contacted on 083 702 8849 or nikki@viljoenconsulting.co.za or http://www.viljoenconsulting.co.za

Networking 101 - Be On Time

Networking 101 – Be On Time

By Nikki Viljoen of N Viljoen Consulting CC

One of the most frustrating things, specifically in a facilitated or semi-facilitated networking meeting is the stragglers coming in.

Imagine the scene if you will – a person is standing up, telling everyone about who they are and what it is that they do.  How wonderful their product or service is and why it is that people should be purchasing said product or service from them.  Everyone in the room is focused on what this person is saying and hopefully, either deciding that they need the product or they know of someone who may require the services of the speaker.

In the middle of all of this another person enters the room.  So far not a problem I am sure that you would agree.  The room is packed though, and said person wants to slink into the only remaining seat which is clear across the room.  So there is much “excuse me’s” going on with much bending over and head bobbing, whilst they find the seat that they are looking for and finally settle in.

By this time the speaker has lost their thread and momentum, the rest of the networker’s have lost their focus and have forgotten the questions that they wanted to ask – the moment is lost.

If possible make sure that you can get to the venue on time, if not a little early.  Before anyone heaves a huge ‘sigh’ and rolls their eyes heaven bound – I know that no-one intentionally wants to be late, but then for goodness sake, use a little bit of common sense – wait until the person who is talking about themselves is finished and either steps down or sits down – there is time enough at this point to dash off to the seat in the corner that you now have had time to see.  This will cause the least amount of interruption and allow the speaker to say what it is that they need to.

Nikki is an Internal Auditor and Business Administration Specialist who can be contacted on 083 702 8849 or nikki@viljoenconsulting.co.za

Business Tips - Keeping Yourself Compliant

BUSINESS TIPS – Keeping Yourself Compliant

By Nikki Viljoen – Viljoen Consulting CC

Over the last couple of years I have met with several small business owners who run their businesses in a less than moral manner.

In most instances they are well aware that what they are doing is wrong.  In all fairness to them – they are perhaps not fully aware of the extent in which they have put themselves at risk.

That said, they are still very much aware that there are consequences if they run their businesses in a ‘reckless or fraudulent’ way.

In fact, the bottom line and the harsh reality of the matter is that both the Close Corporations Act and the Companies Act have put processes in place that allow the courts to make the members of a Close Corporation or the directors of a company, personally liable for the debts incurred it they know that they are running their businesses in a ‘reckless or fraudulent’ way.

The Close Corporation Act says: “A member of a corporation shall be liable to the corporation for loss caused by his or her failure in the carrying on of the business of the corporation to act with the degree of care and skill that may reasonably be expected from a person of his or her knowledge and experience.”

The Companies Act says: “When it appears, whether it be in winding-up, judicial management or otherwise, that any business of the company was or is being carried on recklessly or with intent to defraud creditors of the company or creditors of any other person or for any fraudulent purpose, the Court may, on the application of the Master, the liquidator, the judicial manager, any creditor or member or contributory of the company, declare that any person who was knowingly a party to the carrying on of the business in the manner aforesaid, shall be personally responsible, without limitation of liability, for all or any of the debts or other liabilities of the company as the Court may direct.”

So what does this mean exactly? Here’s the story . . . . .

Mike owns a CC (Close Corporation) and he is in construction, but because he has been sequestrated he cannot have it in his own name, so he puts it in the name of his wife Susan.  Susan is a shipping clerk in a huge corporation, who has no idea of how to run a business, much less anything to do with construction.

Mike has five projects on the go and in the usual fashion with some construction people he has taken 75% of the fees up front to purchase materials and what have you. The balance of 25% will be paid when Mike completes the project and obtains sign off from the building inspectors and of course the client.
 
Mike has purchased material for project 1 and 2, using the deposit from project 1.
Mike has purchased material for project 3 and 4, using the deposit from project 2.
Mike has purchased material for project 5 using some of the deposit from project 3.
The balance of the deposit from project 3 and deposits from projects 4 and 5, Mike has used to buy a new bakkie.

The materials that Mike has purchased are of an inferior quality and workmanship and Mike is hoping that no-one is going to notice.  Project 1 is about 80% done and just has to have the finishing touches, like the light fittings and what have you done but he has now run out of money and there are no new projects in the pipeline.  Project 2 is about 50% done and project 3 has just been started.  Neither projects 4 nor 5 have been started at all.

Mike has dealing with several suppliers during the course of these 5 projects and they know him and he has been paying cash up front or settling the bills on a pretty regular basis.  A relationship has been forged and Mike goes to get more materials promising to pay as ‘soon as he gets to the office’.  Mike has purchased sufficient materials to ‘finish’ project 1 and he is banking on the balance of the money for project 1 to continue with project 2. The problem is that Mike has used inferior fittings and finishes and both the building inspector and   the client refuse to sign off because this is not what was ordered or paid for.  In the mean time the suppliers are hounding Mike for payment and he is now not even taking their calls.

Mike is now deep in the smelly brown stuff – he has set up and is running a business fraudulently as being sequestrated is he is not allowed to register and/or run a business in his own name.  He has accepted money for work, materials have not been purchased.  Materials purchased are of an inferior quality and workmanship, he has not paid for some of the materials.  Mike has spent the money that he was paid on other things.  The workers have not been paid and there is now no money at all.  Mike is now trying to file for bankruptcy which means that the suppliers will get a fraction of what he owes them. Mike has run this business in a fraudulent manner and the Court can hold him responsible in his personal capacity and actually prosecute him to the fullest extent of the law – this could mean not only fines and penalties, but it could also mean jail time.  Actually of the truth be told, the Court will hold Susan responsible in her personal capacity a well since she is the legal owner of the business and she was complicit in the fraud in that she allowed Mike to register a business in her name.

None of what Mike did, was done by accident, it was all done deliberately and with forethought.  Mike over estimated his own luck and his own intelligence.  You see, by running the business in Susan’s name, Mike thought that he would be ‘outside’ of the law and could not be held responsible.  How wrong could he actually get.

Please understand that the days when less than honest business owners could get away with this kind of behavior are long gone.  Hundreds and thousands of small business owners and individuals lost their businesses and their livelihood and sometimes even their homes because of the unscrupulous behavior of some people – it may take a while, but these days, these people can be brought to justice and be held accountable for their actions.

Remember too, that ‘ignorance of the law’ is no excuse.  Make sure that you understand what your obligations are and make sure that you follow them and that you are compliant.

Being proactive is always a lot easier than constantly trying to be reactive.

Nikki is an Internal Auditor and Business Administration Specialist who can be contacted on 083 702 8849 or nikki@viljoenconsulting.co.za or http://www.viljoenconsulting.co.za

Motivation - Starting the Change with You

MOTIVATION – Starting the Change with You

By Nikki Viljoen of N Viljoen Consulting CC

There is a story that goes something like . . .

Once upon a time there was a man who always felt insulted by people around him.  This man went to visit a very wise man and told the wise man all about this problem that he had.

He told the wise man how easily he was insulted by the people around him and how it hurt him when people said bad things to him or about him.

The wise man then asked the man a question that went something along the lines of ‘if someone gives you a gift and you don’t accept the gift, who does the gift belong to?’

The man was thoroughly confused and conveyed this to the wise man.

The wise man tried again saying, ‘if someone gives you a gift and you accept the gift, who does it belong to’?

‘Well it belongs to me’, said the man ‘if it was given to me, then it belongs to me.’

‘So’, said the wise man, ‘if someone gives you a gift and you don’t accept that gift, who then does the gift belong to?’

‘Then’ the man replied, ‘the gift still belongs to the person who is giving it to me’.

‘So there’s your answer’, said the wise man, ‘if someone insults you and you don’t accept the insult from the giver, then the insult still belongs to the giver.’

As usual it’s about choice and how we choose to react to issues and other people’s stuff!

I am often amused at the reaction of people when I say that ‘other peoples opinion of me is none of my business’!  Believe me when I say it, because it is something that I really believe and quite frankly I really don’t give a continental . . . well, I’m sure that you understand exactly what I mean.

That said, I still seem to get angry when people have disparaging remarks to say about the people that I love.  Clearly, that too is my choice and it is something that I will need to look at and process once way or another.

It’s also often about negativity.  I have spent most of the year listening to people moan and groan about the economy, the government, taxes, non-paying clients, the recession (insert anything you like hear) and most of the time their comments have irritated me because of what I saw as ‘their’ choice of actions and yet I am doing exactly the same thing when I get annoyed by other people’s remarks about those that I love.  Instead of rejecting their ‘gift’ of insults or disparaging remarks, I buy into them and react negatively.  Clearly that has to change.

Now it is much easier to say than it is actually to do, but that said change can only happen if it starts with me.  I cannot just sit here on my rear end and command that things change.  The change starts with me and in order for it to start, I have to be aware of what the choices are that I am making.  So for me, it is one of those times that I do the ‘note to self’ thing and this article is clearly, my ‘note to self’.

So starting from today – insults will no longer be accepted by me?  What about you?  Will you still be accepting the ‘gift’ of insults?

Nikki is an Internal Auditor and Business Administration Specialist who can be contacted on 083 702 8849 or nikki@viljoenconsulting.co.za or http://www.viljoenconsulting.co.za
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